Toilet snake bites Taiwanese man's testicles

A septuagenarian was bitten right in the balls by a snake in his toilet this month, Apple Daily reports. 

The 65 year old went to relieve himself one evening when the serpent, which had reportedly snuck in from nearby rice fields, sank its teeth into his testicles. Fortunately the snake wasn't venomous and the man was able to extract his testes from its maw. He then called for help and, presumably clutching his legs together much in the way most men reading this are doing right now, was taken to the hospital.

Toilet snakes turn out to be that rare kind of urban myth: the true one.