In the build up to Euro 2016, ThatsMags.com will be profiling Euro 2016 Shanghai Fans from all 24 countries taking part in the tournament in France. Representing the land of hooligans is Phil Boyle, bow-tie wearing, sexy-sayin' white collar boxing MC for Brawl on the Bund - Rumble in the Jungle, an event that takes place at Hyatt on the Bund on June 3rd. For tickets and more information, contact Pamela at 8023 2199 x 2806 or email tickets@urbanatomy.com.
England, Group B
Opponents: Russia, Wales & Slovakia
Odds: 8/1
Greatest moment?
Fifty years ago, on the 30th of July, 1966 we hoisted the World Cup at Wembley (below). Those were the days. Since then, absolutely sod all (apart from Le Tournoi in 1997).
Greatest Euros moment?
Gazza the legend dinking the ball over Colin Hendry’s head and spanking the ball in the net on the volley against Scotland in 1996, followed by the infamous Dentist Chair celebration. I’m moist even thinking about it.
Worst moment?
Personally, having to watch Euro 2008 while in Shanghai with no England in it, and having to put up with every other bloody nationality getting all excited. Oh the Netherlands, I feel for you this summer…
Worst Euros moment?
Back to 1996 against the Germans in the semi final on penalties when bloody Andy Moeller scored to win it and turned to the crowd with his chest puffed out like a total bell-end (below). God I now feel angry.
Where you and your countrymen (and women) will be watching it?
The Camel. Home of the Voodoo Football Club, the best curry in Shanghai and the Sunday night footy quiz (which by the way is bloody brilliant).
Song the fans sing?
"Jamie Vardy’s havin’ a party, bring your vodka an’ a bag o’ charlie!"
Biggest rivals?
Normally it’s Germany – our forever footballing nemesis. But this time, for the first time, it will be Wales, who are in the same group. Wales have nothing to lose and if Gareth Bale is on form then it could be embarrassing.
Star Man?
Harry Kane (above) – he’s been banging them in left right and center all season for Spurs and he just gets better and better. He’ll be spear-heading the attack and is a good bet for a cheeky RMB50 on top scorer…
One to watch?
Dele Alli – he’s been supplying the bullets all season for Kane to finish off, and now he’s scoring loads himself. This time last year he was at MK Dons in England’s League One – now the 20-year-old will likely be the pinnacle of midfield running the show.
Bad Boy?
Wayne Rooney (below) – don’t make him angry. He burst onto the scene at Euro 2004 and has had his fair share of controversy. Easily wound up, he is likely to lash out. And, oh yeah, keep him away from your gran.
Boy Blunder?
Have you seen the way that ’50 million pound rated’ John Stones is currently playing for a rubbish Everton side? It’s lovely to have a ‘ball-playing’ centre-back but he is far too casual. Row Z you muppet.
Heart Throb?
Adam Lallana – have you seen how perfect his beard is and his skin is so smooth in those Liverpool Nivea adds? And he has a full body dragon / angel tattoo. I’m very aroused right now.
So what are your chances?
Being English you’re not supposed to big-up our chances. But if Roy Hodgson has the balls to throw in our exciting youngsters like Alli and Dier, and puts in Kane and the flying Vardy up top then we could really cause an upset. Either that or we lose against Portugal on penalties in the quarters.
Want to write about your country? Email us at editor@urbanatomy.com.
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